Poems

I am coming back. 

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​I am speaking not of sparklers

nor five tiered cakes

when I speak of us,
I am whispering
of a single definite breeze after hot stagnant months
of spicy slapping sour pouring into sweet, a little bit, left of my taste buds
The revolution sits sizzling on the stove
I am sizzling on a stool
I am crying trying anything from her hands
Like witnessing an entirely new shade of my favorite color during a season, during a stay in a place
I’ll likely be the once
I am screaming
the old country song that’ll take me home in only a month now
they are smiling, nodding along
that first time thru
until they too are screaming
And I am laughing because they call me teacher
But I am sure I am learning more
and I may be losing but I am laughing for the first time at 8 PM
as I play Badminton in the park
I am stopping a run to walk with a friend
and I am telling her
She can do anything she puts her mind to and she’s saying it's everything,
though, she knew already
I am thanking them
over & over,
for mangosteen, durian, longan, and mangos

rambutan, bananas, grapes and pomelos 
she’s inviting me
to try the candy she puts on my desk everyday and the lunch with her name written on the plastic she fully gave me today
I am giving pumpkin pie, popcorn and M&Ms, Mac & Cheese, candied hearts, and apple cinnamon muffins, 
They're giving
rides to the airport, cake to bus drivers, medicines to doorstep
I am seeing
Love again and again
When they speak my language, he stops, she waves to say good morning every day
they all remember my name.
I am startled with excitement
Every time Noung runs outside to greet me,
And every day at 5 PM when my neighbor yells “Teacher”
I am leaving
with a chorus of goodbyes, and “where are you going?” and "see you later!" and enough cake to fill my bike basket
I am loving
every smile, every greeting, every “maa laaeo”
every moment that becomes familiar
every class that laughs and shouts and enjoys and asks me to stay a little longer
Strangers become family, what takes months or years, took a week here,
I am saying
“I love you mom”

“I’ve always wanted a sister”

“I wish I’d met you sooner”

“You saved my life”
I am running
Around the park everyday now and dancing through sunset
I am running out of time and I am running out of ways to say
You changed my idea of love.
You gave me more than words, foods, dresses and songs,
You are a life I will always hold here
before and after questions
between the floodgates of memory overflowing with bittersweet tears
I am speaking of a year's time but i’m feeling a lifetime.

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